Services? Yeah.
Like what?
A happy ending? What's that?
Because I won't go there.
Oh, my God.
I don't need that... I don't need that kind of massage, Jim.
That's not what I was...
Because, you know what, it's dangerous.
And you can pick things up.
You don't even wanna know what you can pick up.
Talk to your uncle Mort. I'd rather not.
He was in the hospital for two weeks.
That's disgusting.
I was talking about
online dating services.
No, Jim.
Yeah, right, at my age? I don't think so.
I've been out of the game for so long.
There wasn't even a game back then.
Dad, don't worry. I'll hook you up.
Do you have those photos?
Here you go.
Wow.
Yeah. Oh.
We might need something a little more recent.
Do you think?
Do you have something that's a bit sexier?
Gotcha.
Did you...
Favorite music.
Um...
Herman's Hermits.
Okay.
Oh...
Girls, one at a time, please.
Interests and hobbies.
Sudoku.
We'll come back to this one.
Are we sure we're not taking off too much?
These caterpillars are kind of my trademark.
Okay... Perfect.
Take a look. I'm nervous.
Oh, that's fantastic!
That is a great look for me!
Huh?
Leaner lines. I still have mobility.
Why didn't I do this 30 years ago?
Looking good.
Why don't we test this new look out tonight?
Oh, um...
The thing is, Stifler is throwing a party tonight.
Oh! Well, another time.
But you could come with us.
It would be nice to get out of the house.
I do have to warn you, though,
Stifler's parties can get a little.
Wild.
What the fuck is this?
Who the hell changed the music?
Sorry, we thought this was more baby-friendly.
Didn't we? Yes, we did.
Stifmeister!
Ch!
Bluck!
Chester!
What have you cock-smokers been up to?
Well, we just got engaged. Yeah.
What? That's so fucking gay.
Yeah, Stifler, we are gay.
Half the lacrosse team was gay.
You must have known that, right?
Dude, you walked in on Doug and Barry in the shower.
I just thought they were wrestling.
Oh.
Are we sure this is Stifler's?
Ooh!
Hors d'oeuvres!
Why don't you give this to our host, son?
Hmm.
Oh, my God! Look who it is.
Hey.
Sorry for interrupting you guys last night.
Bravo, by the way.
Most wives stop doing that after they get the ring.
What are you talking about? Did you change your hair color?
So, is your buddy, the other MILF guy, here tonight?
I thought you always come to these things together.
Let's just say that friendship is a two-way street.
Excuse me.
Mmm.
Could this party get any lamer?
It's not so bad.
You want some E?
No. Why do you have that?
No one else here probably has any.
Are you sure you don't want one?
Yeah.
No... Yes.
No.
Okay. Fine. More for me, then.
And there they are.
Finchy.
There you guys are. Look around. Can you believe this shit?
Yeah, man. Nice work.
For you.
What the hell am I supposed to do with this?
That's called wine, Stifler.
No, no, no, no, not at my party.
I'm going to get us some shots.
Hey, Kev.
Can I talk to you guys for a sec?
Yeah, sure. Wait here, I'll be right back.
So, you brought the goods?
Right here.
I want to see.
What the... Where did those fuckers go?
Hello, Steven.
Mr. Levenstein. Yes.
You made it.
It is so great to see all you kids back in town.
Hmm.
And what a terrific soiree you're throwing here tonight.
Just wonderful!
You know what? I'm going to get you fucked up.
Hmm? Have a shot.
Oh! No, no, no.
I don't think so, Steven. I'm not much of a drinker.
Drink it. Drink it! Drink it! No, I can't.
Drink it! Drink it!
Awesome! Let's do another one.
I don't think so.
Look, Kev, you don't know for sure if anything happened.
I woke up next to her in bed, and all our clothes were off.
I mean, whatever happened, I feel guilty.
Kevin, in France,
it's only considered cheating if your wife catches you in the act.
She's here.
I gotta go.
All right, get ready.
Wait for it. Wait for it!
Wait for it!
Here she comes!
Yeah!
Fuck yeah, Mr. Levenstein!
The name is Noah, motherfucker.
Mmm.
Feel the sofa.
It's so smooth.
It feels like a Smurf's ass.
Did you feel it?
Okay. Mia, can you...
Hey, guys. Sorry we're late.
Hi.
Hey, I got a treat for everybody. I picked something up.
Celebrity Dance Off, Season Six. My man, Chris Ostreicher.
Oh, my God.
We have to watch this.
Who wants to see my baby shake his booty?
I know I do.
JDate? You have to be kidding me.
If you want quality vag, you have to go out into the wild.
"Vag"?
What is that, a half a vagina?
You know, in my day we called it a beaver.
And let me tell you something, I snagged a pelt or two.
I bet you did.
Dad?
Hey, Jim, your dad is so much cooler than you.
Stifler, please stop getting my dad drunk.
No, he's just trying to get me some vag.
Okay, come on.
Yeah! Hey, hey.
Let the man make his own decisions.
Stop. Come on.
Don't listen to him.
I want you to dust off that old dick of yours,
go out there, and get some ass.
Oh! Just go out there.
I think I Will.
Dad, stop, okay? It's exactly what I'm gonna...
I'm sorry, but you have had a little too much to drink tonight,
and I'm not letting you... No, no.
No, son, lhaven% hardly had one drink.
And you know I love you.
I do love you, but you need to
chillax.
"Chillax"? Dad, where are you going?
Do you see him? Jim! Jim!
Let him go. Let him have some fun.
And now we can have some fun.
Come on.
Excuse me.
I'm sorry, excuse me.
Is this a washroom?
It doesn't even occur to you that you're self-centered
because you are so self-centered and...
You know what? Hold on a second.
Can I help you?
Who might you be?
I'm Stifler's mom.
Oh.
I'm Jim's dad.
Later, fucker.
Oh, my God, this is the most ridiculous thing I've ever seen.
Dude, you have an amazing body!
Everybody, raise the roof for Chris Ostreicher!
You have really been bringing it all season long.
But now it's time, Chris, to see if America thinks you done brought it.
You ready? Let's do it.
Let's see the results.
What? Gilbert Gottfried and not you?
Fucking bullshit!
Chris, I'm so sorry, man.
Well, we saw you jam. Now, it's time to scram.
Do you have any last thoughts for the audience?
Okay, guys, we can probably end it there.
What? No, are you kidding? I haven't seen this.
I think what I've learned is to be true
to myself,
because that's what dancing is, it's truth.
And maybe,
if we just danced a little bit more,
there would be no more wars.
No more war!
Well, that is a thoughtful take on foreign policy.
Stick around. Hulk Hogan gets jiggy-friggy, right after this.
You don't want to miss this. Stick around.
Hey.
If you want my opinion, I think you got cheated.
Are you okay?
You know,
when you lose something that's important to you, it doesn't feel very good.
Oz, it's just a show.
I'm not talking about the show.
Hey, Heather, you down there?
Um, coming!
Oh, my God.
Wait here, I'll be right back.
I can't tell you how many times I walked into Steven's room
and I caught him in the middle of sex with some girl.
At least he was with a real, live human girl.
What are you talking about?
I walked into the kitchen once, and I saw Jim humping a pie.
He turned the damn thing into a crumble in about two seconds.
I can top that.
I once walked into my bedroom
and I caught Steven sticking my hairbrush up his ass.
No, and it wasn't the handle side, either.
Oh!
No, no, no.
A pretty lady like you shouldn't be drinking quite so much.
And neither should I.
How about a joint, then?
We don't have to wait 13 years to see each other again.
Yeah, true.
And I guess I could come along on one of your adventures.
Am I good sidekick material?
Sidekick?
I think you are a lot more than sidekick material.
Is everything okay?
It's better than ever.
Mmm. Mmm.
Okay, wait, wait.
I don't think we're dressed appropriately for the occasion.
Put that on.
Wait, where are you going?
To change. Be back soon.
Dudes!
What's up, bro?
Big Stiffy?
Blowjob Lipstein.
Oh, you have to be fucking kidding me!
Excuse me?
Okay.
What the hell are you doing? You just expect me to blow you?
Yeah!
I'm out of here.
Wait. Wait, Wait!
Look, I get it.
You're self-conscious about your body.
Don't worry. I was going to shut the lights off anyway.
You are the same douchebag that you were in high school.
You just expect me to do everything while I get nothing?
Later.
No, no!
Let's make a deal.
I'll get you off, you get me off.
What do you say?
Fine.
But I am putting you to work.
Holy shit.
Chow time!
There you are!
I've been looking all over for you.
Listen, we really need to...
What are you doing?
Taking what's mine.
No, I just wanted to hear the sound of your voice.
Aw, is everything okay? You seem stressed.
Stressed?
There you are!
No, no, no.
I have to go right now, but I'll call you back in a little bit.
Okay. And don't worry, I won't watch Gossip Girl without you.
I miss you, babe.
I miss you, too.
Listen, Vicky, about last night,
that wasn't me.
With what happened...
I don't know. It might be normal in your world.
What do you think happened?
Well, all our clothes were on the floor.
Yeah, because they were soaking wet
from when you got drunk and fell in the lake.
I took care of you.
So, we didn't have sex?
Of course not.
Oh, thank God!
I'm glad you think so highly of me.
No.
Vicky, wait.
Oh, yeah! Oh, my God!
Mia, stop.
9l", my God, yeah!
Mia, get off!
I'm about to! I'm about to!
Heather.
What the hell?
You have something going on with this skank?
Who are you calling a skank, you fucking bitch?
Whoa! Whoa!
Stop it! Stop!
Stop it!
OW! What the fuck?
That's my extension, you bitch!
You motherfucker!
No, Mia! Wait a minute!
By the way, I fucked Mario Lopez!
Ooh...
Okay, it's my turn now.
Uh-uh. Not this time.
Wait, what about our deal?
Now you know how it feels, Big Stiffy.
Gross!
You didn't actually think I'd fall asleep again, did you?
As long as you're mine, I'm happy.
Jesus, Kara. What are you doing here?
Your creepy friend invited me and all my girlfriends.
Nice outfit, by the way. Very kinky.
Oh, shit.
Don't worry. I locked it.
Oh, Jesus.
What the hell kind of freaky shit is going on in here?
AJ, what are you doing here?
I followed you. I had to see it with my own eyes.
First you fuck with my jet ski, then you fuck my girlfriend?
No! God, no! Nothing happened.
You're going down, Sandler.
Sandler? What the...
Jesus Christ!
I'm going to kill you!
Jim, what the fuck are you wearing?
Hey, I can explain everything! Jesus!
Come on! Shit!
Get up, gimp!
Come on, I'm not fighting you, okay?
This is silly. I'm an adult.
Oh, really?
Because to me you look like a little bitch pussy.
Don't be a pussy, Jim.
Look, AJ, just calm down, okay?
What makes you little fuckers think you can crash one of the Stifmeister's parties?
Did you just refer to yourself as "the Stifmeister"?
Because that's the lamest name ever!
I'm going to fucking kill you.
Bring it on.
Hey, Steve, come on, this is...
Where do you think you're going?
Don't mess with the Class of '99, bitch!
Finch!
Don't hurt my friend!
Hey!
Get off my husband, you little piece of shit!
Oh, crap! It's the fuzz!
We have to get out. How do you get out?
I need an escape route!
Oh, shit!
You want to be with him?
Fine! He's all yours.
Come on, man!
Jim, what's going on?
I am so sorry for all of this. I can explain.
Last night I ran into Kara, our neighbor.
She was too drunk to drive, so I drove her home.
And she started taking off her clothes, and touching my...
Okay, I know it doesn't sound good, but nothing happened, okay?
I don't care about her at all!
Thanks a lot.
No, no, Kara, wait. I didn't mean...
Wait, Michelle. Hold on, hold on.
It's not what you think, okay?
I swear, I was just trying to do the right thing, and I...
You have to believe me, Michelle, please.
Whether I believe you or not,
I'm disappointed.
I'm going to stay with my grandmother.
Hold it, Michelle.
No, Jim.
Hey, the fight's over, guys.
We're not here to stop a fight.
We're here about that stolen motorcycle.
Looks like the VIN numbers match up.
Paul Finch.
You're under arrest.
Awesome!
Excuse me, officer.
He won that bike betting on the World Cup in Argentina.
You made some sort of mistake.
Paul, what's going on? What is this about?
Paul.
Finch, just tell them.
Paul!
Hey, shitbreak, when you're getting rammed by your cellmate tonight,
think of Kevin.
Michelle, can I just... Please!
Oh!
Ah!
Dad? Ah!
Dad?
Dad, what are you doing?
You didn't see me! I'm not here!
Is he all right?
I don't know.
What are we going to do about Finch?
Fuck Finch. Let him spend the night in jail.
Come on, Stifler!
Some friend you are.
What about you guys?
You don't call me, you don't e-mail,
you don't comment on my Facebook page.
You guys didn't even let me know you were coming back for the reunion.
Because we knew, somehow, you would find a way to screw things up.
Oh, I'm sorry, Jim.
I wanted us to have a fucking fun time
this weekend, like we did in high school.
But we're not in high school any more.
You are so trapped in the past, Stifler.
When are you going to realize that things will never be the way they used to be?
Fine.
Guess the party's over.
Dicks.
Well, that was a great party.
I honestly think I had fun.
Well, that makes one of us.
Have you heard from Michelle?
No. She doesn't want to talk to me.
What about the reunion tonight?
She said she may or may not come.
What's going on with you two?
Jim, is there anything you want to talk about?
Okay.
Um...
How often
did you and Mom...
You know?
Is that what this is about?
You and Michelle haven't been...
Not lately, no.
Oh...
ls it
an erectile problem?
Because sometimes you can buy a little time
with a well-placed thumb.
Oh, God. I'm just saying.
I don't think that's it. That's not it?
Oh! That's something to keep in your back pocket, because that's a no-fail.
Okay, let's be done with that.
No, things in that department were fine.
And then Evan was born
and we kind of stopped.
And they haven't really picked up since, you know?
This is not a problem, so do not worry.
You understand? Yeah, listen, Jim.
Before you were born,
your mother and I, we would do it every day.
I don't need this.
Sometimes two or three times a day.
This is back in the '70s. A lot of experimentation was going on.
Your mother favored something she called, "diving for dollars."
Holy shit. I'm sorry, I don't need...
That's fine, we can...
I don't have to go on with that.
But my point is, when you have a kid, you become a dad and a mom.
But it's very important not to stop being a husband and a wife.
And if you do that, the sex will come.
That actually makes a lot of sense.
But you can't just wait for the two of you to be alone.
You have to make your own alone time.
Why do you think you went to Hebrew school three times a week?
Sundays, noon to three? Tuesdays, four to seven?
Okay, I get it, Dad.
If you get it, then why the questions?
I'm sorry.
You're going through this, I am sorry. I should be listening.
No, I'm overreacting. I'm sorry.
Thank you.
Again. Really.
Anytime.
Welcome, you guys.
Listen, find your nametag, find out what table you're sitting at.
Ashley, so good to see you! Oh, my God.
Billy! Oh, my God, you're looking so svelte.
You used to be morbidly obese. I was concerned.
Hey.
He)', guys.
Hey, Jim. Oz.
Where is Mia?
She flew out this morning.
Oh. I'm sorry, man.
What about Michelle?
I am not sure yet.
ALL; Finch!
What happened? I called the police department a thousand times.
I appreciate that, Kevin. But my mom, actually, bailed me out.
Guys, I screwed up.
That bike belongs to my boss.
And I was promised a raise, and I didn't get it, so I
simply borrowed it.
The truth is that my life isn't interesting at all.
I am an assistant manager at a Staples in Bayonne, New Jersey.
I lied to my best friends, and I'm sorry.
You know, Finch, just because you sold out
and got a boring job like most of us,
that doesn't mean you should be embarrassed.
Yeah, come on, man. None of that shit matters.
That means a lot, gentlemen.
What about your arm?
Oh.
I spilled coffee on myself while I was driving.
No.
It hurt like a bitch, though.
I'll bet. Jesus, Finch.
Oh, hey, check this out, you guys.
Crazy, huh? Look at us.
A lot of memories.
"Steve Stifler."
"Hopes to keep the party going with his boys."
Any sign of him yet?
I don't think he's going to show.
Stifler?
How'd you find me?
We asked your mom.
Oh, no. I didn't do anything.
We wanted to apologize for what we said last night.
We didn't mean it.
Yeah, you did. I get it, you guys think I'm a dick.
Okay. Well,
maybe you are kind of a dick.
But,
you're a fun dick.
And you're our dick.
Yeah, man. You were one of the biggest reasons that high school was awesome.
Yeah, high school was awesome.
Then we graduated and everybody started getting jobs
and getting married and having kids
and all that other stupid shit.
Now, look at me. I'm the bitch of this place.
Look, Stifler, none of our lives are perfect.
Especially mine.
But what do you say we keep this party going, and hit up this reunion together?
What the hell is going on here?
Oh, my God. This is the jackass.
You're not even close to being finished and you're up here
"chilling with your posse"?
Sorry, we can explain.
No, Kevin.
Allow me.
Yeah, Kevin, allow him.
This better be good, Stafler.
It's Stifler, fucker.
Oh, wow. Who the hell do you think you are?
Are you acting tough in front of your girlfriend? Huh?
Because we both know she's only with you for your money.
Definitely not for your dick.
Because anybody that's peed next to you
knows it's the size of a leprechaun's pinkie.
That's not true.
"That's not true." Oh, yeah, it is.
Look, just because you got a fancy office and I don't even have a desk
doesn't change who we really are.
The truth is, you're still a dork,
and I can still kick your ass.
But I'm not going to.
You know why?
Because I'm the fucking Stifmeister.
And you can take this job and shove it up your dickhole
because I have a reunion to attend.
Dudes?
By the way, I had no clue what I was doing with any of this shit,
so you got a lot of work to do.
Surprise! Hey! You made it.
Of course.
What do you think about the Lions this year?
They got a shot?
We'll see if their offensive line can hold.
Are you planning on being on All Stars?
I actually haven't thought much about that.
You should think about it.
I'm sorry, guys, you'll have to excuse me.
Can I cut in?
I don't know. Can you promise to keep your shirt on?
Come on, buddy, I'm busting balls. Huh?
Yeah, of course.
I'll get us some drinks.
Okay.
Hey.
Shouldn't you be dancing with your girlfriend?
Uh...
Mia and I are over.
She wanted me to be someone else.
Something that I don't want to be.
What do you want, Chris?
Heather, I want this.
I want us.
What about your career? LA?
Look, I know that it's crazy.
And I don't have all the answers right now, but I see you,
and I just know
I want you.
I love you.
So, I'm skiing down a mountain.
Guy has a heart attack right there.
Saved his life. It was a big story, you can Google it.
Yeah, it was.
I bet.
Holy shit! Excuse me.
Hey, excuse me. What the hell is going on?
Ron, I can explain.
Seriously, this guy?
I'm a fucking heart surgeon, this guy's not even on ESPN.
Hey, take it easy, Ron.
What are you going to do? Hit me, Oz? Huh?
Oh, I got an idea. What about a dance-off? Huh?
This isn't a reality show, okay? This is the real world.
You take one swing at me, I will sue you for all you're worth.
I'm not worth jack shit, Dron.
I'm your dick.
Dropped him!
That was awesome!
Listen, we had a blast the other night.
Have you ever thought about being a party planner?
Because we want you to plan our wedding.
Say yes.
Yeah, yeah! I'd love to.
Nice! Oh, my God.
Thanks! This is great, man.
Thank you so much. Thank you, bro.
You're welcome. Thank you.
I have to tell you something.
You don't have to explain.
Look, Paul, I didn't like you because you climbed the Alps,
or killed a camel with your bare hands.
I liked you because you were still the same good guy
that was actually nice to me in high school.
I'm still that guy.
I really am.
You know, the last time I was here was for prom.
I didn't have a date.
Neither did I.
I have to get a drink.
What?
Was my dancing that bad?
Yeah.
Kev! Hey!
Hey, Jess!
Wow. Look, you have a beard! It looks great.
Thanks. I'm kidding.
Let's just get this out of the way.
I'm a lesbian now, and this is my girlfriend.
This is Ingrid.
Good to meet you. Nice to meet you, too.
Lesbians? I knew it!
Why don't you guys make out and prove it.
You must be Stifler. I've heard a lot about you. Ow!
Mostly negative.
Cool, dude. What the fuck?
Jessica, it's good to see you.
No, it wasn't.
What the...
Look, Kev, I think you should go talk to Vicky.
She's really upset over there.
Yeah, thanks.
Nice to meet you.
Be a real man, you have a beard now.
Kevin, don't. I'm fine.
Come on. I was a complete jerk last night.
I was just upset that you would think that I would do that
knowing that you're married.
I know you wouldn't.
Honestly, that was more about me being nervous.
Seeing you again, all these old feelings came up, and...
I don't know, I guess I just felt guilty.
But the fact that I still have feelings for you
just means that what we had was special.
Don't get me wrong, all right.
I love Ellie more than anything.
But no matter how much time passes
you'll always be my first love.
And you'll always be mine.
Kev. Hey.
You have to try these cupcakes, they're awesome.
Ellie, this is Vicky.
Oh, my God! The Vicky? Kevin has told me so much about you.
You're a really lucky girl. He's a great guy.
Come dance with us. No, it's okay.
Yes, come on, this is happening. Come on.
Hey.
My name's Jim.
We were in Mr. Lee's English class together.
Really?
Yeah, I... Sorry, I don't remember you.
Okay.
I was the kid who everyone saw on the Internet.
Mmm.
Sorry, you're going to have to be more specific.
I pre-ejaculated twice.
Oh, Jim Levenstein! Right!
Levenstein. Yeah, Jim Levenstein.
Now I remember. Yeah.
So, how have you been since high school?
Pretty good. Yeah, pretty good. Let's see.
Um...
Oh!
I married the most wonderful woman in the world.
And we have the cutest kid ever.
It sounds like things are perfect.
I'm willing to do whatever it takes to make it perfect.
And that means being the sexiest husband possible.
Really?
Michelle, you look beautiful.
Oh, thanks.
Would you like to dance?
I'd love to.
Whoo!
Stifler.
Sherman? The Sherminator?
What the fuck have you been up to?
Married. Had a kid.
And divorced.
Oh! I'm sorry.
Yeah, I'm sure you are.
But, you know what, at least I got to keep little Furlong.
You named your kid after Eddie Furlong?
Yes, I did. You know why?
Because Terminator 2 is still the greatest film ever made.
Dude, you need to get banged bad.
Okay, we have to get out of here.
It's about time. Yeah.
It's a lost cause.
All these women are either married or came with dates.
Hey, Loni.
Dude, how would you like to have your world blown?
Hasta la vista, Stifler.
Great, everybody's getting laid but me.
This sucks.
Excuse me.
Hi. Hi.
I'm looking for Paul Finch. Have you seen him anywhere?
What do you want with Finch?
I'm here to pick him up. I'm his mom.
Finch has a mom?
I mean, you're Finch's mom?
Yeah. Are you a friend of his?
Oh, yeah.
Paul is like my best friend.
I love him so much. More now than ever before.
In fact, I can't believe we haven't met. I'm Steven Stifler.
I'm Rachel.
What? What is it?
I just got this feeling like something really bad is about to happen.
Don't worry. I'll be as quiet as a church mouse.
Oh, Jim!
Oh!
I want you so bad.
Oh, you have no idea!
Oh, God! Oh, God!
Oh, God, there it is. I don't think I can hold it any more.
Hold it in!
I'm sorry, I will.
I just forgot how awesome this is.
Oh, yeah, I need this.
Oh, God, Michelle! Fuck, I love you!
Jim?
Nadia?
Hey.
I'm sorry. You are busy, yes?
No. Yes.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Nadia, it's so nice to see you.
But do you think you could give us a minute?
Three.
Three minutes.
Okay! So nice you are still together.
Aw!
And I see you've gotten much better at this.
Well, thanks.
That's Jim? He looks nothing like me.
You know, when I was in high school, I dated a lacrosse player.
In fact, I dated a few of them.
You don't say.
I always wanted Paul to be more into sports.
But he was never that interested.
You don't have to sugarcoat it.
Finch was a klutz.
Yeah, I guess he was, but he did not get that from me.
I was head cheerleader.
And if there's anything I learned from lacrosse players,
it's that I like to handle a stick
and cradle those balls.
I love you.
Are you ready for me, Stifler?
Oh, yeah!
Let's go.
Oh, Michelle.
Oh, God, Michelle.
You are amazing!
Better than the bathtub?
Much.
Better than this?
Ooh!
Of course.
Oh, take those off!
We shouldn't be doing this.
Yes, we should.
Oh, Stifler.
Oh, Finch's mom!
Call me the Stifmeister!
Yeah, you are the Stifmeister.
MILF?
Oh, Finch's mom!
MILF.
Tell me I'm the best.
You are the best!
MILF.
MILF. MILF.
Oh, Finch's mom!
MILF! MILF! MILF!
Yes! Yes!
Oh, your son's such a dork!
Stop talking about him!
Well, our first reunion is officially in the books.
I don't know about you guys, but my night ended pretty well.
It was great.
I had a blast. It was unforgettable.
Fuck yeah! I jizzed like a racehorse.
What happened to you at the end of the night, Stifler?
Who did you end up with?
A gentleman never kisses and tells, Jim.
Guys?
I'll be right back, okay?
Kara!
HEY-HEY...
Look, I'm sorry about what I said the other night.
No, I'm the one who should be apologizing.
I can't believe the way I acted. I'm so embarrassed.
Don't be.
When I was your age I was pretty obsessed with sex, too.
I know.
I've seen the YouTube clip.
Oh, of course you did.
But, thanks for understanding.
I was thinking about it, and you're right.
I should really wait for someone special.
Just, it's going to be tough to find a guy as good as you.
I'm sure you will.
I feel like a whole new man after this weekend.
Kind of sucks we have to leave, though.
Not me. I'm going to take some time off my job
and stick around here with Heather for a while.
Nice!
What about you, Finch?
Selena and I, we're planning a little jaunt to Europe.
Just make sure you call your mom. She misses you.
How would you know?
Oh...
I guess this is it, huh? Back to reality?
We shouldn't wait until the next reunion.
We should try to get together every year.
What do you say, until next time?
Until next time. Until next time!
I fucked Finch's mom.
What?
What was that?
Hmm?
What's this?
Oh, no, dean No, no, no.
No, dear. No!
Oh!
Oh...
Oh. Oh. Oh.
Ah. Oh. Oh.
Oh, boy. Oh, boy! Oh, boy!
Oh, my God! Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
Oh! Oh!
Oh, my God!
Ah!
Great movie.